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Divisional Round Prediction Haikus

| January 19th, 2024


All times ET. Home team in CAPS.


Saturday 4:30 PM – Texans at RAVENS (-9)

A battle wages

in the land of McNulty.

The game is the game.


Saturday 8:15 PM – Packers at NINERS (-9.5)

Cover your damn eyes.

Green Bay can beat ANYONE.

They will keep this close.


Sunday 3:00 PM – Bucs at LIONS (-6)

One city makes cars.

One city is all strip clubs.

Baker be dancin’.


Sunday 6:30 PM – Chiefs at BILLS (-3)

My head says Mahomes.

But my heart is in New York,

drenched in Elmo’s sauce.


Last week the picks were 2-4 but in fairness I picked the Steelers expecting them to cover in a blizzard. This week I’m on Baltimore -9, Packers +9.5, Bucs +6, Bills -3.

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World’s Smallest Caleb Williams Breakdown

| January 17th, 2024

It’s draft season and Caleb Williams is on my mind — I’ll have a longer, more thorough breakdown out later this offseason, but today I wanted to highlight his play from within the pocket. Specifically, whenever I watch him I see the following:

  • Quick, natural release
  • Throws with consistent anticipation when targeting his first read (if open)
  • Patient within clean pockets, works through progressions naturally
  • Strong pocket footwork that creates problems for opposing EDGE rushers’ angles
  • Arm talent that can naturally push the ball down the field on command

Couple that with his tendency to keep his eyes downfield while scrambling, even when under duress, and you’ve got a very dangerous modern passer that looks like he’d fit right in on NFL Playoff Weekend after a bit of refinement in 2024.

One more I just found: the QB in Wisconsin has made plays like this famous over the last few weeks. Here’s the same throw under pressure made against one of the best defenses in college football.

Editor’s Note: My son has been sick with stomach flu over the last few days, so I appreciate your patience within website content. It’s draft season, so I’ll see what I can whip up as I prep to head out to the Senior Bowl in a few weeks.

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Wildcard Weekend: Picking the Games in Haiku

| January 12th, 2024

All times are ET. Home team in CAPS.


Saturday 4:30 PM – HOUSTON v. Cleveland (-2.5)

His name is Flacco.

No, not the Manhattan owl.

But still the man soars.


Saturday 8:00 PM – KANSAS CITY (-4.5) v. Miami

It will be frigid,

projected at six below.

Too bleak for Flipper.


Sunday 1:00 PM – BUFFALO (-10) v. Pittsburgh

It’s the Bar Bill wings,

versus Primanti Brothers.

Dip this win in blue.


Sunday 4:30 PM – DALLAS (-7.5) v. Green Bay

America’s team.

A nation’s eyes upon them.

Will they hold up? Yes.


Sunday 8:15 PM – DETROIT (-3) v. Los Angeles

Jared was a Ram.

And Matthew was a Lion.

The latter moves on.


Monday 8:00 PM – TAMPA BAY v. Philadelphia (-3)

The home team is bad,

and the road team might be worse.

Someone has to win.


The Picks: Cleveland -2.5, Kansas City -4.5, Pittsburgh +10, Dallas -7.5, Los Angeles +3.5, Philly -3 (but I won’t be betting the last one).

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Checking the Tape: Week 18, Bears @ Packers

| January 10th, 2024

Also, something to watch for today…

Your Turn: Do you want to see Matt Eberflus stay?

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